Jimmy Nail 'Crocodile Shoes'

Chart Peak: 4
YouTube

'Crocodile Shoes', the title track from the hit TV series, was the 3rd Top 5 single for Jimmy - it reached No. 4 in December '94... His previous hits were 'Love Don't Live Here Anymore' and 'Ain't No Doubt'.

A slightly odd chart career the former James Bradford had had up to this point, with all his singles either making the Top 5 or missing the Top 40 entirely; he finally broke the mould when the follow-up to this, 'Cowboy Dreams', peaked at 13. At this point, though, 'Crocodile Shoes' was his lowest-peaking actual hit, though it went on to notch up the longest chart run of his career: a total of 20 weeks Top 75, which was a lot back in the mid-90s.

The reason for this success was of course that this was the first time he crossed the two strands of his career. Whilst it's hard to contradict the argument that his previous success was largely thanks to the goodwill he'd built up as an actor, this was the first time he'd been able to promote his music directly whilst in character. In Crocodile Shoes the TV series (which he apparently created as well as starring in) he plays a factory worker who becomes a successful country singer, and the title song is a decent enough fit, offering the sort of sentimental down-home country music that fits in with that storyline. It finds Nail making the most of his limited vocal availability, even if the metaphor of his crocodile shoes crying is a bit confusing - surely crocodiles are famous for fake tears, not real ones? Millions of viewers were presumably too charmed to think that through. Whether this could plausibly have been any sort of hit in "real life" is another question.

Also appearing on: Now 5, 22, 32
Available on: Crocodile Shoes

Jan Hammer 'Miami Vice Theme'

Chart Peak: 5

YouTube

The biggest instrumental hit of the year was recorded by a German - Harold Faltermeyer. The second biggest has been recorded by a Czech - Jan Hammer. The 'Miami Vice Theme' raced to No. 5 in late October.

So, er, well done Mr Hammer. He fared even better in the US, where this topped the chart (the last instrumental to date to have done so). Even though I wasn't allowed to watch it, I know that Miami Vice was a popular TV show but I don't really get why anybody would want to buy a single of this. Sure, it works pretty well as a soundtrack to people running along with immaculate hair and guns in their hands, preparing to burst through a doorway; mind you, of course, my idea of how to soundtrack that is doubtless influenced by having grown up in the 1980s. But what I struggle to imagine is somebody going out and buying the 7" single, taking it home and playing it. When would that be appropriate? If you were actually running about with a gun in your hand and bursting through a doorway, you'd probably make the needle jump.

As far as I can tell, it wasn't that uncommon for a TV theme tune to be released as a single in the 1970s and 1980s, but only a few charted, especially non-vocal ones. There must have been something particular about this (and Howard's Way) that crossed over. Maybe it was some aspirational way for people to buy a piece of the programme itself. Either way, it's kind of lost on me now.

Also appearing on: Now 10
Available on: '80s Pop #1's

Allstars 'Things That Go Bump In The Night'

Chart Peak: 12

YouTube

Sandi, Thalia, Ashley, Rebecca and Sam are the Allstars - and if they look familiar to you, you've probably seen them in their ITV series "Starstreet"... Spooky single 'Things That Go Bump In The Night' is accompanied by a similarly spooky video, filmed in London's Highgate Woods.

I didn't watch much Children's ITV even when I was a child and had a TV set so the chances of my recognising any of the members of Allstars (or allSTARS* as we were supposed to spell it) were pretty slim. Those of you who do still have televisual devices might have seen them in Channel 4 programmes I've barely heard of, or might even have noticed that one of them is married to Dom from Dick And Dom.

I do remember their chart career, though, or at least this song (released as a double A side with a cover of 'Is There Something I Should Know?', strangely enough). Once you get past the cod-'Thriller' intro, it turns into a bouncy bass-driven pop track of the sort Britney had just stopped making, ironically recalling Michael Jackson's 'PYT' in places. You'd never guess it was written by one of D:Ream. Outside the context of the video or the Scooby-Doo movie this apparently featured in, the lyrics actually seem a different kind of creepy. They certainly could be interpreted as somewhat predatory, but really it's only a song and as inane pop music goes, it's a lot better than Geri.



Also appearing on: Now 51
Available on: Allstars [Ltd Version]

Joe Fagin 'That's Living Alright'

Chart Peak: 3

YouTube

And here's one of the more dramatic transitions in the series, as the slinky American club groove of Julia & Co is followed by the defiantly British theme tune to the comedy drama Auf Wiedersehen, Pet which of course I wasn't allowed to watch at that age. I remember hearing the song though, because it became such a big hit single (nominally as a double A-side with the opening theme 'Breaking Away' but this was the side that got all the attention).

If the programme itself, about unemployed builders from the depressed North East seeking employment in what was then West Germany, seems an artefact of its time, the record is possibly even more so. Although it's supposed to be a sort of keep-smiling-through singalong, a quarter-century later it sounds very stiffly produced in a way that jars with the mood. Worse (in this context at least) it betrays its origins by not really having a pop song's worth of material, so Fagin virtually has to sing it all twice to make a single and even at less than three minutes it seems to be outstaying its welcome.

Available on: Music From Auf Wiedersehen Pet

Jan Hammer 'Crockett's Theme'

Chart Peak: 2

YouTube

OK, so Karel Fialka is of partly Czech parentage, and Jan Hammer is also Czech. Were they doing this on purpose?

I've never seen an episode of Miami Vice, and at the time I didn't really know what it was about (when you're nine, a vice is something in the woodwork room) or who Crockett might be, but I was dimly aware that it was supposed to be a big deal, which would explain the two big hit singles from the soundtrack; this one charted higher in the UK than the actual theme tune.

Chiefly, I remember seeing this performed on Top Of The Pops, and my dad sagely commenting that the whole thing sounded like an intro. I don't think I could put it better than that myself. Nowadays, I have more appreciation for the work that would go into creating music with the technology of the day, and I'm prepared to be generous and assume that it sounded good in the TV show itself. But listened to as a stand-alone tune it's just dreary.

Also appearing on: Now 6
Available on: Escape From Television